All The Things I Miss About You
by LilHam
Summary: After Roxas leaves, Axel is a train wreak. At this point he'll stop at nothing to get his speical SOMEONE back. Akuroku. Rated M for other chapters. Decided to continue.
1. Prologue

A faint, glow of light could be seen from a wall of blank darkness, the ridges on the brick walls was even plastered with the black, mysterious feel that was emitted from the odd looking man as he leaned against the side of a building. The man had strange features that were oddly enough visible in the harsh lighting or lack there of. He had a narrow, soft, and delicate face, equipped with naturally soft pink cheeks that seemed to look like a pastel Platte of natural colour blended and painted on his gorgeous face. On the upper part of his cheeks where strange tattoo like marking, with a purplish, royal blue tint to them, the shape was anything but ordinary they were almost like teardrops that had dried upon his face from the ghosts and skeletons of his past. Moving up to those beautiful eyes, a bright emerald green colour that dazzled and danced in the heart-shaped moonlit glow, his eyelashes long and silk like giving them an almost fake appearance. Painted on his eyes his wore a bright violet-red eye-shadow coming from the corner of his thick eyes and ending at his temple. His eye's lined with black, smudged lightly at the corners, from the clear droplets that had accumulated in his eyes, giving off the appearance of a lighter colour of eyes, almost like a sea-green colour. His eyebrows trimmed expertly, making them thin and well organized, they were given a sad look to them the tips curling under. Painted lips, gloriously glazed over, parting slowly and only slightly. On top of his head his hair was a bright, fire red colour that shined with hair gel and hair spray that was the only thing that kept his hair in the awkward spikes up-top his head.

The lower parts of his body was just as exquisite if not more, his neck and shoulders were perfectly in proportion, giving him the almost famine look, while his chest was large and shaped. Though his waist was incredibly thin, he was practically skin and bones, but still to the point of being healthy. His body was a perfect hourglass shape, hips large and wide; the only thing separating these amazing parts of his body was a long black trench coat, equipped with two long chains that dangled from the hood, and a necklace like piece that connected the parts of the hood together. It was only zipped down to about the man's knees so he could easily maneuver his legs and walk freely. In his fragile, thin, gloved fingers he held a cell phone firmly in his hand. His pointer finger resting lightly on the 'send' button and his other fingers wrapped around the number keys. Sad eyes glued to the screen of the phone, his lip quivering as the cool air scraped across his face and body. Even though he control the element over fire, and his body temperature stayed high he was unusually cold.

A lone, stray glassy tear dripped down his cheek landing to his chin, as he said one word, only one, "_Roxas_". His cold eyes stared at the beautiful picture of a beautiful boy, his eyes a light deep shade of blue, brightest of all the colours, his face tone and a shade of tickled pink, lips perfectly pout shaped and adorable, and his smile, oh that amazing smile it could light up the darkest of rooms, his blond hair spiky, shaming any kind of mohawk. Overall the boy was extremely gorgeous. The tall thin man took one look at this model-like boy on his phone before turning his head, and letting it fall out of his graceful hand, landing in a puddle of water left from yesterday's rain. One day had pasted since the beautiful boy left, and yet it seemed like years. The red-head briskly walked away head turned straight ahead, almost afraid to look back, he felt his body shiver and tense just as the ringer of the wet, muffled phone rang, '_Your voice, was the soundtrack of my summer, do you know you're unlike any other? You'll always be my thunder, and your eyes are the brightest of all the colours, I don't ever want to love another, you'll always be my thunder, so bring on the rain, oh baby bring on the pain and listen to the thunder'._

_

* * *

_So yup, this is my first story in a LONG time. This was sort of just for a friend, but I figured what the hell, I might as well just post for the fun of it. And sadly its more of a discribtion of what Axel and Roxas (mostly Axel) look like. Don't sue me. I know its pretty crappy I haven't been able to write forever. I had to find some sort of insperation. I found that insperation in a certain amazing song, 'Thunder' by Boys Like Girls. AMAZING band, deffiantly check them out and it'd really help if you heard the song before or are listening to it. XD It makes a LOT of sense and I suppose you sort of have to play Kingdom Hearts (two espeically) to understand what a great bond that Axel and Roxas share. YES, Akuroku D. My favorite pairing of alllll time. Well right now anyways. I would really apperciate if you Review for me. That'd make me smile, and i'm sort of going through some shitty times so my story is pretty emoing. Thanks guys. Chuu.

Haylee.


	2. Chapter 1: Insane?

"**_What did you expect?  
The dark was going to consume you sooner or later." The muffled voice murmured from behind his own shadow causing everything around him to be settled in darkness, the darkest of the dark; no light was found anywhere. Hope was slain, and dreams were merely hazes of what the world used to be. _**

The red-head placed his tightly wrapped hands, with bandages, as blood seeped from freshly cut wounds, out in front of his body, surching for anything. Anything at all that could be found, a person, light, even death if it meant getting out of wherever he was. "Where are you?!" He shouted, afraid that the voice would leave him if he didn't react immediately. 'How do I know that voice?' he asked himself one hand drawn back clutching desperately at his bare chest. He voice just gave a heavy-hearted chuckle, mocking the other in his misery.

"Where am I? Where are you?" It questioned mocking Axel, even if he couldn't seen it, Axel could have sworn it, he, whoever was smirking.

Axel turned his body in quick motions looking around himself, for even a spark of light, in this place he couldn't miss any kind of light. "Fuck." He muttered as a sharp pain ran up his fragile body, striking him odd as, Nobodies didn't have feelings and therefore…didn't feel pain? 'Right?' He thought as the sudden pain finally hit his nervous system. He screamed out pressing his open-wounds of hands onto his head, blood staining his already red hair.

"Don't be so angry. Isn't this what you wanted? You kept wishing to die, so young too, it's a shame, even for a Nobody. Such a pretty, non-existent body going to waste." It laughed, increasing Axel's pain, emotionally, physically, mentally.

Axel's green eyes flashed open, the words leaving him breathless, 'is this suffocation?' he thought grabbing his throat with one hand, blood seeping out of many parts of his body now, even the bandages were ripe with blood. "No!" He yelled, catching his breath as his words choked him preventing him from saying anymore; as he fell to his knees in agony. "Make...this. Stop!" Axel screamed as he could feel his blood turning to fire, warm and pumping through his veins as he stared down into the blackness, his weak arms supporting most of his weight.

"Your hard to please. Fine, if that's what you really want then so be it." The voice answered as Axel heard a snapping sound, he wasn't sure it was the snapping of his body being torn or if it…was something else.

-813-

'Where am I?' Axel muttered in his head, as he heard…peace, warm sounds, his body wasn't weak anymore, as his emerald eyes slowly opened. He peered out, afraid of what had become of him, as he looked up he saw a…sunset. 'Sunset?' He asked himself before leaning up on his elbows, looking at his hands, which were now in perfect order, fixed and unchained and bandaged. Axel slowly examined the rest of the his body, through strips of his hair covered most of his face. "Natural…god what the hell is going on?!" He yelled seeing as though the mold of his hair was gone, as it laid naturally on his head, no spikes, just long crimson hair; resting on his bare shoulders. Not only had his hair been stripped of all the components, his body was always missing clothing as he felt himself up for a moment; confused as hell.

"Well if sleeping beauty isn't awake?" The voice had came again, Axel searched around himself with hatred burning through his eyes, 'where is that fucker?!' He screamed in his head. "So…does this look familiar to you?" It asked, as a man clearly appeared in the same long cloak that he worn almost everyday of his life. 'The Organization?' He wondered, before feeling that strong sense of hate unburying itself from his mind.

"You bastard! What the fuck is going on?! Where am I?!" He yelled pulling himself to his feet, as he spread his arms out, waiting for his chakrams to summon themselves to him.

"Don't bother, you wouldn't want something to happen to Roxas, now would you?" He asked, a smirk as bright as the sun itself peered from underneath the man's hood. In Axel's head a little white flag popped up, as his eyes widened yet again, his body relaxing slightly, 'Roxas?' Axel pondered shifting his glaze again.

"Where's…Roxas?" He asked, desperately looking around incase he was somewhere around. "You're buffing, wipe that smirk of your face." Axel spat angrily, as he folded his slender arms across his feminine chest; disbelieving of the strange man now.

"Buffing?" The man laughed before snapping his fingers, the same snap that had sent Axel out of that dark world. "Think I'm buffing now?" He asked as Roxas slowly appeared in front of Axel's eyes, tied with a thick layer of dark clouds circulating around the small blonde.

"Axel?" Roxas whispered, as his small body shook with a pitiful tremor, this was defiantly the real Roxas, his eyes glistened with that bright aquamarine colour lightly faded with tears that were streaming down his pink cheeks.

"Roxas!" Axel shouted as he took a large steep closer to the smaller boy, before receiving a halt from the man in the black cloak.

The man shook his head, waving a finger at Axel, with a small laugh, as he gripped Roxas' small arm in his hand, easily wrapping his whole hand around Roxas' arm. Axel looked puzzled as the spark of angry flew through his body once again, protecting Roxas was something had absolutely had to do, not matter what happened to him. Axel's body shook once as finally he summoned the chakrams clutching them in his tightly closed hands, they burned with a fire that was uncontrollable. Axel took a small step back as he flung both chakrams with all of his might aiming directly at the cloaked man.

Though despite the efforts Axel made to have perfect aim, the cloaked man was much quicker as he picked up the Roxas' small body, using him as a human shield. Roxas refused to scream or yell out as his small body was quickly erupted with flames and he slowly faded away from the cloaked man.

"Ax-el?" Roxas' lips moved, although the words couldn't be pushed out of his small voice box. A small smiled perked through the flames and dark as he finally disappeared. Everything had happened so quickly that not even Axel could comprehend what all had just happened. A terrified look quickly had formed on Axel's face, as the frames slowly sunk into his body. Tears flared at his eyes as his chakrams fell to the ground, flames fading as tears fell to the ground, Axel's body shaking as he clasped. The cloaked man laughed as he walked up to Axel grapping Axel's neck tightly and bring his head upright.

"Pathetic!"

-813-

Twisting and turning in his sleep, the red-head pressed his eyes into the soft silky pillow, gripping onto the sheets that lied around him, since he'd kicked all of the red and orange silk off his slender body as he trashed under the little speck of moonlight that was coming from behind a curtain. His walls the sheets had all been stained with the marks of the past and even more of the future. Axel's room was covered with red colours and tints of orange, making it seem like the whole room was blasted with fire.

Axel whimpered in his sleep; panicking nightmares had befallen him once again. "Roxas!!" He shrieked as he head came up quickly from the pillow, looking around his room in a sort of a night sweat. "It was…a dream?" He asked himself, turning over onto his back again, pressing his palm to his forehead as he breathed heavily. "Thank god." He whispered, before sitting up. As Axel sat up, he suddenly felt a presence in his room, which was odd, no one hardly ever was in his room, other then if it was for sex or bearing news. His green eyes peered from sided to side as he hopped out of his bed, opening the door from his room and walking down the long dark hall way. 'I wonder what time it see, it's so quiet…it must be early.' He thought, though it was always dark in the long halls of Castle Oblivion. He dragged his feet to the bathroom door, opening it quickly and locking it behind him, as he examined the area to make sure he was absolutely alone. Axel's head fell downward so he was looking at the porcelain sink; he turned on the water as he lightly splashed some onto his face, cooling his body from his heat. After he'd dried himself off, he opened the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of pills, marked: 'sleeping aid, do not take for long periods of time may become dependent'.

"Right." He thought, as he quickly popped two in his mouth swallowing them without any kinds of liquids or anything; he'd become so used to taking them. After his was sure his pilled had slipped down his throat, he stumbled off to bed again, afraid of what the night would behold him.

-813-

"So. Axel, tell me, what was it this time that caused you these, as you put them 'terrors'?" A man with thick glasses and piercing hazel eyes asked, his hair lying contently in a ponytail that he'd thrown it in. Axel had known this man a quite long time; he was his therapist, after all when you can't trust the people you live with who better to come too? Or that's what Axel had figured.

"Well…um. Roxas. I suppose. He left again." Axel said sadly, shifting his eyes away in embarrassment; before looking back at the slightly older man as he wrote down every thing that Axel had said.

"Mmm that's right, Roxas, do you think he might be the key to these, 'terrors'?" He asked not looking up from the paper that he was writing on.

"Maybe…" Axel said honestly, he wasn't feeling like explaining anything today, Axel just felt sick, though he didn't think Nobodies could feel sick. Whatever it was it was making butterflies in his stomach.

"Right, right. Now explain to me, how have your dreams been lately?" The man asked, scooting from his chair slightly forward turning all of his attention to the patient. "What are they like?"

"Well, **there's these terrors, and it feels like as if someone was gripping my throat, and awful tremors, but worse then the tremors, there's these terrors, like last night the tremors were awful but worse then the tremors, the terrors, and it feels like as if someone was gripping my throat squeezing**…" He answered; choking on his own words as he muttered a cough, feeling weak as his head slightly fell to the side. He could feel the tears forming at his eyes again.

"Is that all?" The man asked, as he ran his fingers through Axel's hair comfortingly.

"No…** sometimes, I see flames, and sometimes I see people I love dying, and always going up in flames, and I can't do anything**." Axel finally answered, telling the whole truth as he trusted his therapist more then he even trusted the Organization.

"I see. Axel, you're defiantly experiencing night terrors, it's quite common among people who have experienced a rough life, or some sort of traumatizing event. Axel I've never heard about your childhood or, life at home or anything, and I've known you for so long, you think that is why you're having these sudden terrors? Or like you predicted, Roxas might be why, but honestly, tell me what do you see in such a young boy? You're a man after all shouldn't you be chasing, at least after a man your age?" He asked backing away from Axel giving him some room, after all it wasn't his right to physically help Axel it was more mentally.

"Roxas. He's everything to me, he's just, my only friend, I thought I could trust him, I mean it's not like he did this to me, like he wanted me to feel like I'm insane, he's not like that. You'd like him, he's sweet and sensitive and adorable, and he's just…a lot like me, I guess. He reminds me of when I was his age." Axel rambled, trailing off too look the only small window in the whole blank and whitely coloured room to see a single black bird flutter it's wings by the window; only for a moment blocking out all sunlight, and creating a haunting darkness.

-813-

EEP. Done with Chapter 1 I've decided that, the first chapter was only a prologue. It makes sense, I suppose, since it was rather short. Anyway! This story was for one of my very best friends, Amanda : my darling-hunny-baby; and so on. XD. ILOVEYOU KIDO. Better fucking love this story, because I put my passions and dreams into it. T.T XD and it's damn hard to write a depressing story when you're watching Spongebob Squarepants. XDD Anyways, I'll sum up this chapter for anyone who's going WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Mmmkay, so, first bold part is made up of a 'night terror' or one of Axel's nightmares, where in the end, he kills Roxas himself. Soon after he wakes up, and pops sleeping pills, which are clearly an addiction to him. And then, yes I made up a therapist for Axel :D. Anyway the whole point of this part of the story is to ask the reader, is Axel insane? Or he is mearly obsessively in love? For now that is up to you to decide! Oh and the second bolded part is from the song 'Sleep' by My Chemical Romance. Thanks for reading. I'd LOVE FOR SOME READ & REVIEW PLEASE. :D Hope everyone has a wonderful morning/day/evening. Thank you. bow.

-Haylee


	3. Chapter 2: Love Found

"Damn." Axel mumbled as he peered out one of Castle Oblivion's many windows, it was surprising that they had any windows, since it was dark all the time, it didn't make any difference whether they would have any or not. Though it was unusual; it seemed so bright today even though the castle was completely shrouded in darkness. Axel laid his head back into the chair, resting his tired eyes that had just been stung with the violent dark light. As he gently peered out of slit-like eyes he saw a shrouded figure and quickly brought his attention to the other standing behind.

"Axel? Hi…um. You seemed kind of down, what's up?" The younger male asked, removing his hood in a goofy fashion, flashing an awkward looking smile, as he lightly ran his fingers though his Mohawk; fixing what the hood had messed up.

"What's up?" Axel asked, repeating what the other had said, glaring at him, as if annoyed by his presence. "Demyx. Nothing is 'up'." He muttered bitterly, giving Demyx the 'fuck off' look as he turned away pretending to ignore him.

"Oh…do you know where Roxas is? Man—I mean Xemnas 'wants his location immediately'." Demyx giggled after he'd given his best 'Xemnas' impression, not taking Axel's grumpiness to heart; well if he had a heart.

"Roxas? Hmm. I don't recall, and even if I did what makes you think I'd be a kiss ass and get him in trouble with the Superiors? I think you've been hanging around, Marluxia a little too long. You'll do anything just to get an extra day without someone turning against you. " Axel spat locking gazes with Demyx as he mentally cursed himself, it was never a good idea to insult Superiors, but hell, what else could go wrong?

"Axel, you know, you've gotta stop taking these things so personally, Roxas wouldn't leave you intentionally, I mean you guys are usually glued together." Demyx cooed, teasingly attempting to cheer Axel up. When he thought all else methods failed he plopped down on the chair next to Axel and stared at him. Axel raised an eyebrow at him, questioning his actions, before shaking his head. Demyx pouted before giving an 'hmph'. "He'll come back. Just wait and see." He said before standing back up and walking away from the annoyed red-head.

"Right…" Axel said to himself, tilting his head downward, purposely avoiding the gaze of the moon that shone down on him mockingly.

-813-

"Rain again?" A small boy asked himself, peering out from under the black hood, and pushing out one of his gloved hands, feeling the small patter of rain on his delicate palm; as he frowned up at the disappointing sky. 'It's been a while since I've felt the rain,' he thought before lifting up his hood, reviling his childish features, the spiky blonde hair was unmistakable and his eyes shone like big sapphire orbs.

"Mmm." He mumbled, as he stared at himself in a puddle that had gathered around his feet. "Who am I anymore?" He asked himself, feeling as though his reflection was suddenly changing and there wasn't anything he could do; he surely was confused on who he was. He kneeled down, his knees getting soaked from the puddle as he splashed the puddle away so his face couldn't be made out from it. As he looked away he noticed something, oddly familiar. He stared at the object before his eyes lit up and he stumbled to it, grasping it into his small hands as he laid on the all-to-known street. He stared at the cellular phone, tossing it and turning it in his hands 'Why do I recognize this?' he asked himself, as he stared at it; puzzled. Then it hit him, like a layer of bricks breaking onto his fragile body; Axel.

'Axel's?' He thought as he rubbed his fingers on the solid materials, before noticing the small strap attached to it, it was a heart, the thing they all desired most. He let the smooth, warn material grace his finger tips as a sudden sadness swept over him. The boy attempted to turn on the phone, only to hear a faded noise of where it had been ruined by the rain, his fictional heart ached with the need to hear anything of familiar sounds or voices.

'I can't, just go back, I haven't done anything, and I promised myself my feelings wouldn't get in the way of what I want.' He debated, unsure of what his goal was, why had he returned to the streets in the first place? He was on a steady route of figuring out his purpose in life, before he'd wandered back to his starting point; The World That Never Was. As he hear a low sound of beeping coming from the phone, he directly shifted his gaze back to it. Though the screen was cracked and broke he swore he could see the picture, the one they'd taken together when Axel had been overly excited to show off his new phone. He laughed to himself quietly, as though not even making a sound, though instead of feeling happy, there was a stone cold feeling of sorrow, and his tears couldn't be mistaken for rain.

-813-

"Axel!" A shaking sounding voice could be heard from down the hall of Castle Oblivion, accompanied by the angry sounding voice came a variety of loud, stomping shoes, hitting the delicate flooring.

Lying on his bed, Axel ignored the over-dramatic voice and obnoxious stomping, he placed his bare arm over his eyes, attempting to block out the world for even just a second. As he just drifted off into peace, a loud banging sound came from the door along with a boom as the door was literally torn open.

"You lazy bastard, what do you think your doing? Don't you have some sort respect for the Organization…or at least you're self?! Look at you, lying on your ass again." The pink haired man yelled, puffing out his childish cheeks as he narrowed his sky eyes at the red-head in disgrace. He crossed his arms across his fragile looking chest keeping his gaze straight onto Axel's face that was shrouded by his arm.

"Nope. Not anymore." Axel answered not bothering to look at the other man, at the moment; Axel was discouraged with himself, since Roxas was still no where to be found, making it exactly; fifteen days, and 13 hours since he'd left.

"Ugh. You, disgust me. I'm serious, look at what you've done to yourself. Your hair's a mess, your lying in your…boxers on your bed with your hands in your face. Is this what the 'flurrying of dancing flames' has stooped down too; honestly its disgusting, no wonder Roxas left you." Marluxia said coldly, even if he made it seem that he was attempting to 'help' Axel, his methods were unusual and cruel.

Axel shot up, moving his arms away from his face, glaring forcefully at Marluxia, he stared at him in disbelief before he yelled, "Fuck you." Is eyes shown with anger, he usually was content but there was something about, the pink-haired man that drove he absolutely crazy; consumed with anger and hate. "You don't know anything so shut your fucking mouth. I'm so sick and tired of being around idiots like you; I hate this place I'm leaving! One day, you'll be fucking sorry when you're lying dead and alone in some opposite universe!" He continued to glare at Marluxia, treating the situation just as Marluxia had, using harsh words and cruel tactics.

"Fine. I see, how it is, your just as much of a traitor as you used to be, and just like your little boyfriend; desert the Organization, I'll come and find you when I have a heart, and shove it in your face; and laugh when you fade away into darkness and you'll wish you'd stayed with us." Marluxia stated firmly, batting his eyelashes angrily, as he hit his fist onto Axel bed, inching his way lightly toward the red-head.

"Go ahead! I don't want a heart anymore, damn it all, it doesn't matter anymore. Nothing, matters, anymore." Axel's expression changed, as his hatred and angry flowed from his delicate body, as he was left with no other emotion but sorrow. Axel's eyes weakened, making him seem tired, like he hadn't slept in days; which he hadn't. "Just go, and leave me alone, I don't feel like dealing with you anymore." He turned his head away from Marluxia, attempting to ignore his guest again.

Marluxia shook his head, in disbelief, he cursed in his head before grabbing hold of Axel's chin, turning and tilting his face upward to look in his direction. "Axel, you don't feel like dealing with anything anymore. What's wrong with you? What happened to the guy who used to beat the shit out of someone for looking at him wrong? Have you changed that much over the last few months? It's almost sickening, I'm tired too, its not easy for any of us so stop complaining about your own god damn problems and look around you!" He yelled; bring his face closer to Axel's staring him directly in the eyes, his blue fading into green. "Stop, being so lost." He muttered before narrowing his eyes, before leaning in and locking his mouth onto Axel's, bring him into a deep kiss.

Axel's immediate reaction was to pull away, and as much as his mind screamed for him too either shove Marluxia away or get up and walk out, his body had different plans for him. Axel's lips quivered against the other's as he slowly kissed back letting himself and his soul just melt into the kiss, relieving most of the tension and agony that had built up in his body; and leaving him with pure sexual fixation. Though surprisingly, it wasn't enough for him, he wanted so much more, anything just too at least rid him of his aching mind. Axel's mouth widened as he tilted his head; eyes still peering out from silts at Marluxia's facial features, never had he gotten a chance to notice all the things he'd missed on others like; Marluxia's long eyelashes, pink cheeks and his lips tasted sweet, almost like a forbidden fruit.

Without any warning, Marluxia forcefully slammed Axel against a wall, grasping the top of his uniform in hand, squeezing it tightly as he pushed Axel's head back with his mouth, applying force onto the red-heads body, keeping him almost flat against the wall. Marluxia used on hand to fist into Axel's hair, while the other began stripping him of his cloak, undoing the zipper quickly before letting up and pulling franticly on the sleeves and tossing it to the side of the room; leaving Axel with nothing but his pants on. Marluxia lacked his mouth, wide-open onto Axel's neck, nipping the biting with force, leaving little purple marks on his body.

Axel let out a smooth moan, scratching his nails onto the wallpaper that covered all the walls of Castle Oblivion, leaving marks onto the delicate and simple pattern.

Leaving no time for Axel to even breathe, Marluxia moved his mouth down his chest, nipping at a nipple while pinching the other shamelessly, not caring if he hurt Axel; it was considered as some form of punishment for being a 'traitor'.

Axel's emerald eyes peeked out as his mouth twisted desperately, as he felt like he was literately being chewed apart. A part of him loved it while the other part felt dirty and used. Though what Axel had feared was happening, instead of his mind being taken over by Marluxia's body, images of Roxas piped into his mind, filling him with a guilt trip that was beyond ignoring. "Ah…no." Axel whimpered, slamming his fists against the wall, sending Marluxia's blue eyes up Axel's body, staring directly into the other's face.

Marluxia studied the other for only a second as he worked his way down to the edges of Axel's pants as he began peeling the tight jeans from Axel's slender body.

'"_Axel? Do you…like me?" The young blonde asked, staring innocently up with those beautiful blue orbs, he could do no wrong; Roxas was the picture of innocence and youth. _

"_Of course I like you, Roxas." Axel answered grinning down at the smaller boy. _

"_But…do you like me, like me?" _

"_You mean…like, love?" _

"_Yeah…"_

_Axel smiled, the grin faded as he wrapped his arms around the other's small body, Roxas burying his face into Axel's chest, holding onto him lightly. "I do." He answered running his fingers through the delicate blonde hair.'_

Axel's eyes shot open, wide as they could possibly be, Marluxia nipping at his lower stomach. Axel's gaze shot down his own body, as he stared at the other in a panic of emotions. He quickly pushed Marluxia back gently as he wiggled away from the pink-haired man, grabbing his jacket and zipping up his pants at the same time. "I can't do it." He muttered before running out the room.

Leaving Marluxia confused, "Stupid." He mumbled, getting up from his knees and daintily brushing himself off, before he grinned slightly, exiting the room himself.

-813-

Axel inhaled a cigarette, holding it firmly between his pointer and middle fingers, exhaling deeply, in a sigh, as he dazed up at the ceiling in living room like area, only the sky could be seen from top of the ceiling. Axel closed his eyes, taking in the sensations of the cool rain, pitter-patting on the window along with the cigarette pressed against his lips. "Rain, again." He muttered the stick bouncing with the movement of his lips. It had been raining for exactly three days straight; then again, it always rained in The World That Never Was. Axel had officially fallen in his own world, he didn't honestly know where he was anymore, and there was a bundle of rumors being spread around Castle Oblivion.

'Roxas is dead.' 'Roxas was turned into a dusk, Axel went insane, Axel's depressed, and he needs medication.' Axel had heard them all and would only shake his head at the lies being spread. Though…was he insane? He doubted it, usually crazy people where confined to a small padded room. Axel shivered, as the thoughts filled his head, he couldn't stop himself from thinking, but he would have liked too, just for a moment, Nobodies truly didn't have rights to anything; but Axel was sure he had the right to make it all stop. He wished that Roxas would either come back or fade away from him. Either way he'd be a mess or would be actually be able to forget?

'Why can't I live anymore?' He wondered, was he being punished for something. Nobodies don't have the right to be, and his life was going great for a while, maybe that's it…Nobodies aren't allowed to be happy, they don't feel emotions, but he was sure it was something.

Though something disturbed these thoughts, one thing he could do was, medication. The only thing he knew to make everything go away. Without thinking anything over, Axel raced as he stormed his way into the bathroom, tearing up the medicine cabinet, surching for something; anything to clear his mind. Morphine? No, they only kept that in the medical part of the castle. Sleeping pills? No, he wasn't going to bed anytime soon. Pain pills? No, he didn't feel pain. Then it struck him, the perfect pill; Lithium. He stared at the bottle before grinning to himself.

"Perfect." He muttered opening the bottle and popping a few pills in his mouth, not bothering to see how much you're supposed to take, he didn't care. He stuffed the bottle in his coat and put his hand on his head for a moment, hoping at it'd kick in soon. After all, he remembered he read something about it, seeing as though it helped bipolar and depressive problems. Though as soon as he thought he was feeling better Axel went to walk out the door of the bathroom and collapsed.

-813-

"Axel...Hey, hey, Axel?" A voice muttered, Axel found it familiar but couldn't place it for a moment, he was groggy, and couldn't see very well as he wrinkled up his nose trying to make-out the face.

"Roxas…?" Axel asked, reaching out his hand before letting it go. "Mmm, ugh. I feel awful." He mumbled.

"No you dumbfuck, its Larxene. No wonder you feel awful, look what I found." Larxene smirked waving around a few pills that must have fallen out of his pocket, as she ran her fingers through her short hair, two antenna looking pieces sticking up from her head. 

"Dammit." Axel whined, looking up at the ceiling, attempting to avoid contact with Larxene. "I bet Xemnas is pissed; he'll probably want to kill me." Axel laughed slightly, as he closed his eyes firmly, what else could fuck up at the moment?

"Nope. No one else knows, you're kind of lucky I'm the one who found you. Some of the other guys would have nailed you. Not that I won't." She grinned, standing up and turning away from the red-head. "I suggest you get to the phone now, call your cell phone, and ah if it's possible flush the pills down the toilet." She offered standing still for only a moment before she began walking away from Axel.

"My phone? What, why?" Axel asked a bit startled from the fact that he'd abandoned it weeks ago, and hadn't even thought of it since.

"Heh. Well that's a stupid question, anyway, I shouldn't be telling you this or anyone but, since I'm so very nice, I guess I'll just tell you. Roxas, he called. From your cell phone, I picked up and he asked if it was you and I said no, and he hung up." She said before waving her hand, and walking away. "Good luck with that, traitor." 

Axel suddenly felt like he'd been struck by a bullet. 'Roxas is alive.' Axel thought, as a sigh went through his body, as he laid on the bathroom floor, not actually wanting to get up, he felt weak all of a sudden, his body was crushed by the weight of the world on his shoulders, though he wanted nothing more then to see Roxas again. He reluctantly pulled himself up, stumbling over his own feet as he ran through the halls, shoes clanking as they hit the tile floor. The air breezes through his hair as he gripped onto the closest phone, quickly pressing the keys as his hands shook with a sudden panic, he hoped that one thing would go right and Roxas would answer. He waited patiently as the silence at the other end of the phone was killing him, he wondered if someway Organization XIII tracked the call and Larxene was lying about not telling anyone. Axel would be pissed if he found out that she'd lied to him, he'd be enraged possible to the point of killing her. He didn't care what happened to the rest of them anymore, he felt like he hated all their guts. All thirteen of them. He suddenly heard the faint breathing on the other side of the phone. "Roxas?" Axel asked in a gasp, he whispered into the phone, so incase someone was around they wouldn't hear him. Again there was a long pause at the other end of the phone, and he wondered if he was so worked up that he was just hearing nothing.

"Axel…is that you?" The other voice answered, almost in a whimper.

"Roxas! Yes, it's me." Axel answered a bit too loud, but he didn't care, he was beyond happy, he was overjoyed.

"Axel…how did you know?"

"What do you mean?"

"How did you know to call? I mean, you left your cell phone didn't you…why?"

"Oh. Larxene told me. Don't worry! She didn't tell anyone else. I couldn't bear to look at my phone, since you left. I haven't done anything…I mean I've been alright! I just miss you, a lot. Why did you leave?"

"Oh…Axel. I um, I had to figure it out. You know that, please don't be mad at me; I don't want that. I miss you too, that's why I called, to ask you to meet me. Come, too…," There was a long pause, before Roxas answered, "come to, the ally that I left, ok? Meet me here, now."

"I will..." Axel said right before he heard a click on the other side of the phone, before he also hung up. As soon as he hung up he ran too the door not stopping to tell the others when he'd be back or where he was going. He just ran, as fast and as hard as he could, he could feel the rain weighing down on his head. Though despite everything, this was all he could possibly ask for, to see Roxas, nothing else would matter as long as they were together everything would be ok. Axel finally saw it, the ally he remembered their exact location of where they'd parted, the first time in so long; they were always together, not matter what happened. Finally he saw it, the top of the blonde locks he saw, and it was truly Roxas.

Axel ran harder even though he felt like his legs were going numb; it was cold and the weather was nothing to be standing in for the rain was pouring down in buckets. "Roxas!" Axel screamed, finally reaching the other boy and flinging himself onto him.

Roxas gasped before he noticed it was Axel. They fell into the wet street, both of them soaking wet. "Axel." Roxas squirmed from under the other, wrapping his arms tightly around Axel who was lying perfectly on top of his small body.

"Roxas…I've missed you so much." Axel muttered into the smaller boy's neck, sending small shivers up Roxas's spine, feeling the warmth of their bodies against the cool air and street. Axel looked up at Roxas, lightly moving his body up, just slightly so their faces were close together.

Roxas stared up into Axel's bright eyes that shown through the darkness that surrounded them. "Axel, I…are you crying?" He asked, interrupting his own thoughts and crashing the other words out of his mind. He lightly removed a hand from around Axel's waist and touched one of his gloveless hands to Axel's soft cheeks, before he lightly smiled.

"Hmm...No. I um." Axel's face turned grim as he couldn't control the moisture coming from his eyes, at that moment he felt so good, he felt a release of every emotion that ran through his fragile body.

"Axel it's alright, I swear, I won't leave you, **ever **again." Roxas grasped on of his hands around Axel's longer fingers and pressed Axel's hand to his lips, lightly kissing it. Roxas could feel his emotions draining out of him too.

"I can't prevent you from your destiny, are you sure this is how you want it too be? Don't make promises you can't keep." Axel asked sadly, before he pressed his lips to one of Roxas's cheeks; he needed to taste that sweet virgin skin again, it was more addicting then anything else.

"No! You're my destiny, don't say stuff like that. Please, Axel I need you. More then anything else, you can't understand what you have until it's gone and it took me those weeks to realize that I'm a mess without you…" Roxas whimpered, as tears fell down his cheeks, mixing with Axel's tears and the rain that covered both their bodies.

"Roxas…you don't know, how much I've missed you. I was a wreak. I just love you so much, that doesn't seem right, but I do love you; more then life itself." Axel whispered in sobs, as he pressed his lips onto Roxas's.

Both boys' lie on the cold pavement, in the rain and chilly air; and for that one moment, they were content.

'**_When you are with me, I'm free, I'm careless, I believe, above all the others we'll fly, this brings tears to my eyes, my sacrifice.'_**

'_**I just want to say hello again.'** _

-813-

Yay! Done with Chapter 2. Oooh. I hope you guys are enjoying this :l since I'm not getting any reviews. But I have a ton of people who read it, so that's all that really matters right:D. Anyways. It'd be lovely if you would review it for me though. I'd appreciate. :. Well this was a lovely chapter; I threw some AxelxMarluxia, for my friend Jesse. :D. That's our pairing. And of course, FINALLY we get some Akuroku right guys:. The ending of this chapter made me cry, writing it. XD; it was so hard to write it. God. Anyways, HAPPY VALENTINES DAY:D. Hope you all are with that special someone today :. NEXT CHAPTER will be up sooner or later.

-Haylee 


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